Long time coming

I had a very interesting conversation today with the ex-wife of an ex-boyfriend. (This is the same ex-boyfriend, Jim, that I had the all-satisfying encounter with a few years back.) I am not going to go into all the sordid details of my relationship and subsequent breakup with him except to say that he was dating this woman before, during and after dating me. I would run into them as a couple every once in a while and we would all be very civil and but I was never exactly certain what was going on. Were they married? Expecting children? Did she hate me? Anyway, come that fateful encounter, it was clear that they were no longer together and that he was with this other woman, though he never came out and said that to me. After that I would run into him every once in a while walking the dogs, on his way home from work, (his parents, where he was living, live quite close to me), etc. The last time I saw him, ironically on my birthday this year and he actually wished me a happy birthday which he never remembered when we were together, he told me that he had bought a new house on Bowen Island and was moving in a few weeks. I congratulated him on his new home and we parted ways. I haven't seen him since.

Yesterday I was out with some girlfriends browsing through the shops and his ex-wife was working at one of them. We said hello and started chatting. She asked if I knew that Bandit (his dog and one of the best things about him) had died. I told her that yes, he had told me that and I recounted my meeting with him at Whitespot. So she said that I knew that they had divorced. I told her that actually, I was never even really certain hat they had gotten married, but assumed so and that she had gotten the condo in the divorce. She did, much to his mother's dismay. After they split, her best girlfriend basically stopped calling. Someone told her that there was a rumour that she and Jim were dating. She called him and he denied it. it was the same woman I had seen him with that first time and guess what? They got married two weeks ago!! We laughed about this and both felt kind of sorry for this woman because it seems that he has not changed one iota since I dated him over 10 years ago. Wardrobe still consists mainly of cycling gear and it is like pulling teeth to get him to put "real" clothes on. And when he does you almost wish for the cycling clothes ---- flannel shirts, bad jeans, cowboy boots, etc. Real redneck gear. And forget ever leaving the North Shore, let alone travelling anywhere. Small-minded ignoramus is this boy's middle name.

Her co-worker was thoroughly enjoying out conversation as she has gone through the whole breakup and divorce with her and so knows all the "inside scoop", my role included. We caught up on how our own lives were going and on how much better off we are without him dragging us down and that we have actually progressed and become successful adults while he is still a Momma's boy. We hugged goodbye with a promise to get together for cocktails, soon -- two women who were played against each other for a number of years and now may form a great friendship.